While the first half of this year brimmed with opportunities to turn inwards (both literally and figuratively) for exploration as well as reflection, the latter half just seems to drag on forever. This blog originated as a therapeutic mean for me; and while it still is, I guess at one point a few months ago, I kind of decided I wanted to spend more time resolving things internally before I can find the inspiration to write again.

Even as an introvert I’ve never actually spent this much time at home. I miss getting all dressed up for work, listening to podcasts on my daily commute, and having the much needed motivation that comes from being in the same office as my co-workers. On the other hand, I do appreciate the ability to spend 24/7 with Jarvis and know it will be a rough adjustment once normal corporate life resumes. I’ve also gotten a lot closer to my Mom through our spontaneous errand runs and conversations about the most mundane things. In addition to all these endless precious moments, this year has given me more time to devote to self-care and re-evaluation.

As I went through different turmoils, I learned the importance of focusing on the positive side of everything. It is okay to not have things work out immediately or according to plan, at least there were actions taken to bring forth change; and in a year when life often feels stagnant, change can be good. It is also okay to move backwards a little, you’re only gaining the necessary momentum to charge forward into even greater horizons. It’s all a matter of perspective. Though I’m still very much a pessimistic person who overthinks too much, simply realizing how negativity affects the energies around me and the people I care about has helped me tremendously in letting go faster of anything that no longer serves my happiness. I know myself and circumstances best so I will foster this confidence by disregarding any external factors that may distract me from my own path.

While relinquishing has its benefits, I’m also proud of my perseverant spirit in never giving up on the things that matter. Every problem has a solution if you’re willing to find it; and if it doesn’t yet exist, there is nothing wrong in manifesting one. Although a little contradictory to this whole idea of persistency, I often find the simple remedy to be forgiveness. Forgive life for throwing you that curve ball, forgive the person/people for causing it, and forgive yourself for anything you may have done to contribute to it. Absolution is not the same as surrender. You’re forgiving to open up a door for healing and transformation to come through to make situations better than how they began.

2020 is dreadful, yes, but I agree that it is a pause we all needed. I’m not asking for a full 180 in 2021, I’m just hoping for continued progress and growth with current plans in place as well as any new adventures that are ahead.

Now I’m just going to put my feet up for the rest of the year and give myself a well-deserved break!